GOING FAST
Sat, July 28th

JUST ADDED
Wed, Aug 15th

JUST ADDED
Sat, Aug 18th

JUST ADDED
Fri, Aug 3rd

JUST ADDED
Thur, Aug 16th

JUST ADDED
Fri, Sept 7th

JUST ADDED
Fri, Aug 10th

JUST ADDED
Fri, Aug 17th

JUST ADDED
Sat, Sept 8th

Sous Chefs Takeover and The Artless Bards

$12.  Pre-sale  |  $15. At Door

Saturday, July 28th, 8:00 p.m. (doors open at 7:30 p.m.)

“Give them great meals of beef and iron and steel, they will eat like wolves and fight like devils,” — William Shakespeare, “Henry V,” Act III, Sc. VII

Shakespeare has a lot of quotes about food. Like this one. And “If music be the food of love,” and others. But we’re doing Shakespeare one better: we’re putting his love of food and cakes and ale and sack with an actual (improvised) cooking show. That’s right: The Artless Bards, our The Unified Scene Theater improvised Shakespeare troupe, with Sous Chefs Takeover, the brainchild or Reaves McElveen and Stephen Mann (in town for this weekend) and Jamal Newman. You’ll laugh (at their genuis)! You’ll cry (when they cut the onions). And you’ll leave the table satisfied. Promise! Plus, two new sets just added: Padsworth, a brand new troupe that formed out of our classes here at The Unified Scene Theater, plus a special guest set featuring Second City’s Stephanie Anderson!

Your Opening Troupe: Padsworth

A brand new troupe that formed out of the latest Harold class at The Unified Scene Theater, Padsworth delivers big laughs through big characters. Padsworth: Cory Seth, Frankie, Abralind, and Neil Satchell

Update, just added — A Special Guest Set Featuring Stephanie Anderson!

Stephanie Anderson is Chicago-based actor/writer/improviser who began her “comedy career” in DC back in 2006 with a beginning improv class taught by Shawn Westfall at the DC Improv. Since that first class she fell in love with the art form and has never let it go.
You can find her regularly improvising im Chicago with harold team- Cecilia at iO theater, with Max A/C at the Chicago Improv Studio, and as one-half of the improv/sketch duo- Girlish, who also tour their comedic p.o.v. around the country.
As a teaching artist, Stephanie is a member of The Second City Training Center and directs sketch and improv throughout Chicago.
She’ll be performing a special guest set on this bill, duoing with Shawn Westfall.

Your Feature Troupe: The Artless Bards

For thy entertainment this eve: The Artless Bards, a rascally troupe of scapegraces and dunderpates who shalt mangle, confusticate, and otherwise bedevil the memory of the Bard. What will spin faster? Their tongues as they spin a fantastical tale, or the Bard’s corpse as his life’s work is profaned for your pleasure?!?! The play’s the thing! All the world’s a stage! To be or not to be, probably!

The Artless Bards:

  • Seth Alcorn
  • John Miceli
  • Stephen Major
  • Julia D’Ambrosi
  • Shawn Westfall
  • Iulia Gheorghiu
  • Elijah Sloan

Your Headlining Troupe: Sous Chefs Takeover! 

The sous chefs at DC’s finest restaurant, “The White House Special”, are tired of waiting their turn for fortune and fame behind the shadow of head chef Jeff Boyardee. Holding him hostage, Randall and Ted will host a live cooking show to showcase their extraordinary culinary skills to the world!!

  • Stephen Mann
  • Reaves McElveen
  • Jamal Newman

Fish Outta Water and No Rei Mis

$12. Pre-Sale | $15. At Door

Friday, August 3rd, 8 pm. 

It used to be called “Gravid Watto.” But we’re rebranding this awesome monthly show because it’s expanding, too. 

If you’re familiar with Gravid Watto, you know the premise: we coupled the biggest “Star Wars” nerds in the area, those who could recite dialogue from every episode verbatim, with improvisors who decidedly *weren’t* fans of the movies to the point of never having seen them. Then we put them in scenes together, with the SW nerds reciting dialogue from the movie, and the improvisors, well, not. Hilarity ensued.

But since there’s so much cinema history to be drawn from, and since there are so much cinema that many improvisors have never seen, we’re expanding out of the Star Wars universe into those of other classic movie narratives. Hence the name change to Fish Outta Water, and hence, more fun to be had by all. Movie geeks of all stripes will love this — which, in short, means everyone.

Joining Fish Outta Water will be indie scene troupe No Rei Mis. If you sensed from their name that this might a music-based format, you sensed correctly. Show up!

No Rei Mis: 

  • David Richman
  • Lisa Kays
  • Lori Verchot Carpenter
  • Fish Outta Water: 
  • Greg Benge
  • Heather Marie Vitale
  • Paul Hitlin
  • Em Fiske
  • Spencer Orenstein
  • Kevin Koeser
  • Matt Strote
  • Allyn Engle

What movies will they be drawing from? Watch this space…

Bring Back The ’90s and Blood Pact

$12. Pre-Sale | $15. At Door

Friday, August 10th, 8 pm. 

 

Someone once warned us against thinking in terms of decades, because they aren’t really that definitive or all-encompassing when it comes to summarizing an era. But you know? To hell with that dude. For instance, the ’90s! Who doesn’t love them? A Clinton in the White House! Zach and Slater were still at Bayside! P Diddy was still Puffy. Those were the days, right? Well, no need to simply reminisce: the cast of Bring Back the ’90s will make them reappear right before your eyes, via the magic of technology (they’ll broadcast music videos from that decade) and the even magic-er magic of improv. It’ll be bigger than Zach Morris’ cell phone!

BBThe’90s will be joined by all-female troupe Blood Pact: Taking a suggestion from the audience, four female friends reflect on their relationships and experiences with the help of flashbacks and clear character identities.  First there was Golden Girls.  Then Living Single.  Then Sex and the City. And now…..Generic Four Female Friend Group!

Your Feature Troupe, Blood Pact, is:

  • Marie Iwaniuk
  • Sarah Spell
  • Susan Jacob
  • Trish Rowlinson

 

Your Headlining Troupe: Bring Back the ’90s:

The ’90s were a great time for pop culture, fashion, and of course… music videos! Bring Back the 90s is an improv show based on the most memorable 90s music videos. The audience will get to choose which music videos to watch. The cast will use the images and lyrics from those videos to create hilarious, and off-the-charts scenes.

Bring Back The ’90s is: 

  • Erick Acuña
  • Ginnie Seger
  • Martin Steger
  • Nik Manohar
  • Neil Barron
  • Olivia Martinez
  • Elaine Colwell
  • VJ: Felicia Barnes

 

 A Fundraiser-Show for “D-Lemma: The ‘Documentary’

$10.

Wednesday, August 15th, 8 pm.  

“Have you ever wondered not just WHAT a penis, but WHY a penis? What are they even good for? Prize-winning pretend-journalist Angelica Louren sets out to solve our generation’s greatest question in this eye-opening investigative film interviewing the top professionals on men’s health: women.”

That’s the premise behind Stephanie Kline and Tammy Hineline’s mockumentary “D-Lemma: The Hard Truth,” which the two, both military veterans, concocted after getting fed up with common misconceptions about simple women’s anatomy: Breasts *aren’t* perfectly symmetrical; the size of a woman’s labia has *nothing to do* with how promiscuous she is or isn’t. And having sex with 100 men is not going to make a vagina look any different than having sex 100 times with one man. Both thought: “What if the roles were reversed?” and sat down and wrote “D-Lemma: The Hard Truth.”

The filmmakers goals for this film? “That women (okay, men too) get a real laugh out of the reversal of this scenario – because we’ve all had a man in our life that thinks we can produce milk without being pregnant or believes that we pee out of our vaginas. We don’t. Still more women suffer real physical harm and neglect from actual medical professionals who hold outdated beliefs about us. It’s frustrating – but when we turn that frustration into comedy we can all have a good laugh about it. Maybe.”

But they can’t make this film without your help. “After all – it’s uterUS, not uterME.”

Show up to a fantastic comedy show that will feature improv comedy, stand-up, and storytelling — all provided by humans who happen to have female anatomies and know how they operate, and don’t. All ticket sales, and donations made during the show, will go to support this worthwhile project.

Performers For This Evening: 

The Quitters — one of DC’s premier all-female troupes:
 
Jennifer Koch
Andrea Quach
Karyn Wilson
Sanaa Abrar
Paula Atkinson
Molly Graham
Kristen O’Brien
 
Stand-up comedy local DC favorite Maria Batdorff
 
Sketch Comedy From The Rebelles:
 
Erin Ward
Shana Holmes
Diana Arnold
Stephanie House
 
More improv from local TUS-home-grown troupe Too Many Lizzes:
 
Iulia Gheorghiu
Liz Crowther
Kelsey Flora
Liz Neely
 
And your host, and telling a story: Rachel Hinton

Come laugh. Come give to this worthwhile project.

About D-Lemma: The Hard Truth: https://dlemmafilm.com/

About Tammy Hineline: Tammy Hineline (Director) is a Marine Corps veteran and freelancer. She spent nine years in the USMC as a Combat Photographer/Videographer and has worked on multiple projects from small news packages to large productions featuring Medal of Honor Recipients and the Commandant of the Marine Corps. Her film work has gotten awards in several competitions including the GI Film Festival, Military Videographer of the Year, and from the Marine Corps Heritage Foundation. She is currently a full time student majoring in Integrative Studies (Legal Concentration) with a minor in Economics. However, film remains a large part of her life and D-Lemma is her first major film project since leaving the Marines in 2016. Her dream job is investigative rescue helicopter pilot economist-journalist.

About Stephanie Kline: Stephanie Kline (Producer) is a Marine Corps veteran and policy analyst. She currently performs as a stand-up comedian in Washington D.C. and travels across the country to deliver her routine. Her material has been featured on local radio. She was lead sports reporter and co-host for the culture and sports podcast, “3 Marines,” from Lima Charlie Media and stands as a strong example for veteran-focused media and comedy. In addition to her comedy work, Stephanie also writes short fiction. She recently participated in the 48HR Film Project for the first time and co-wrote the script for her team’s entry, “My Becca.” Her comedic stylings aren’t the only thing she brings to the table though – her savvy organizational skills are a great match for D-Lemma.

Veterans Improv Show at Dog Tag Bakery

$10.

Thursday, August 16th, 7 pm.  @ 3206 Grace Street NW

Join The Unified Scene Theater in its partnership with Armed Services Arts Partnership (ASAP) and Dog Tag Bakery as we enjoy an evening of creativity, expression, and humor through the art of Improv. This show will feature veteran and military-affiliated graduates of ASAP’s partnership with our theater,  its Operation Improv class, in which military veterans, military family members, and active-duty military are offered improv classes free of charge, classes that are, once again, taught at our theater.

NOTE: This show will NOT be held at The Unified Scene Theater, but rather at the veteran-owned Dog Tag Bakery (3206 Grace St NW, Washington, DC 20007) and will take place from 7 PM – 9 PM. Doors open at 6:30 PM!

Tickets: Tickets are $10 online and at the door. All proceeds from ticket sales will go directly toward ASAP’s programs.

The Artless Bards & Special Guests

$12. Pre-Sale | $15. At Door

Friday, August 17th, 8 pm. 

Tonight The Artless Bards grace the stage of The Unified Scene Theater, and they’ll be joined by special guests Padsworth, as well as another perhaps another surprise guest that we’ll announce soon (watch this space). Come out this Midsummer night and dream some funny Shakespeare and non-Shakespeare stuff with us.

Your Opening Troupe: Padsworth 

A brand new troupe that formed out of the latest Harold class at The Unified Scene Theater, Padsworth delivers big laughs through big characters.

Padsworth is: 

  • Cory Julie
  • Frankie Abralind
  • Neil Satchell

 

Your Feature Troupe: Colossus 

A recently formed indie troupe made up of seasoned, veteran improvisors, Colossus will show you why they’re mythic in talent and intellect.

Colossus is:

  • Saleh Karaman
    Zach Mason
    Reaves McElveen
    Donna Steele

 

Your Headlining Troupe: The Artless Bards: An Improvised Shakespeare Show

For thy entertainment this eve: The Artless Bards, a rascally troupe of scapegraces and dunderpates who shalt mangle, confusticate, and otherwise bedevil the memory of the Bard. What will spin faster? Their tongues as they spin a fantastical tale, or the Bard’s corpse as his life’s work is profaned for your pleasure?!?! The play’s the thing! All the world’s a stage! But this one’s where you’ll guffaw the loudest on this fair eve!

The Artless Bards:

  • Seth Alcorn
  • John Miceli
  • Erin Smith
  • Stephen Major
  • Julia D’Ambrosi
  • Shawn Westfall
  • Liz Crowther
  • Iulia Gheorghiu
  • Elijah Sloan

PLUS, another special guest to join them on this fair eve. Again, watch this space!

The Second-Annual 24-Hour Sketch Fest

$8. Pre-Sale | $10. At Door

Saturday, August 18th, 8 pm. 

Sketch teams usually take a few weeks to hone, craft, rehearse, direct, and perform a sketch show. Well, screw that. We’re putting a couple of local sketch comedy teams to the test, as we make them brainstorm, write, cast, rehearse, and direct a 3-5 minute sketches all within a 24-hour time period.

Wait, what? Yep. A “finished” sketch in 24-hours.

But that’s not all, since there’s an element of improv comedy involved: a week prior to the show we’ll be reaching out to our fans and followers on social media to get suggestions for the sketch troupes, suggestions that will be required, under penalty of disqualification, to be used in their sketches. We’ll write these up, put them in a hat, and then draw them out during the intermission of our Padsworth/The Artless Bards show, happening the previous evening on Friday, August 17th.

One they get them, the clock is ticking, and six troupes — which include Bad Medicine (returning Judges champion) and Preacher’s Tit (Returning Audience-Choice Winner) — are on their own: they then have 24-hours to brainstorm, write, cast, rehearse and perform a 3-5 minute sketch, performed during this show on the evening of Saturday, August 18th.

And wait, there’s more: the results — including whether or not the suggestions were used — are under scrutiny. Why? Because there’s money to be won. All troupes participating are eligible to win a Judges’ Prize and an Audience Prize. Can one troupe win both? YOU DAMNED WELL BE THEY CAN!

In short, comedy under the gun: you know, what they do at “Saturday Night Live” every week, and what just about every live variety show during the era of live television used to do, you know, just about every day.

Show up. Laugh. Be The Comedy Judgy McJudgerson you know you wanna be. And have a blast.

Participating Troupes: 

  • Bad Medicine 
  • Preacher’s Tit
  • And more to come! 

Bad Medicine & Friends

$12. Pre-Sale | $15. At Door

Friday, September 7th 8pm

Tonight, we at The Unified Scene Theater are once again featuring brand-new sketches from those DC sketch-genius mainstays, Bad Medicine (the judges favorites in last year’s first annual 24-hour Sketch Fest) who will show precisely why they’ve earned both mantles. Who will they be joined by? We’ll know soon, but they will be equally awesome. You won’t want to miss this one.

Your Headlining Troupe: Bad Medicine — A Sketch Comedy Show

Bad Medicine is a Washington DC based sketch comedy group specializing in the dark, the cerebral, and the absurd. Though it has humble beginnings–conceived over a plate of tater tots–Bad Medicine has since performed all over DC and the east coast including Charm City Comedy Festival, Philly Sketchfest, Montreal Sketchfest and NYC Sketch Fest. They are a group of singers, designers, lawyers, and students with the shared goal of writing the best comedy about the worst of humanity. No side effects. No horse pills. No cures.

Bad Medicine is:

  • Andy Weld
  • Elizabeth Kemp
  • Michael Alvino
  • Jessica Randazzo
  • Seth Alcorn
  • Kelly Andersen
  • Sean Robinson

Their Guests: Coming soon! Watch this space!

Bad Medicine & Friends

$12. Pre-Sale | $15. At Door

Saturday, September 8th 8pm

Tonight, we at The Unified Scene Theater are once again featuring brand-new sketches from those DC sketch-genius mainstays, Bad Medicine (the judges favorites in last year’s first annual 24-hour Sketch Fest) who will show precisely why they’ve earned both mantles. Who will they be joined by? We’ll know soon, but they will be equally awesome. You won’t want to miss this one.

Your Headlining Troupe: Bad Medicine — A Sketch Comedy Show

Bad Medicine is a Washington DC based sketch comedy group specializing in the dark, the cerebral, and the absurd. Though it has humble beginnings–conceived over a plate of tater tots–Bad Medicine has since performed all over DC and the east coast including Charm City Comedy Festival, Philly Sketchfest, Montreal Sketchfest and NYC Sketch Fest. They are a group of singers, designers, lawyers, and students with the shared goal of writing the best comedy about the worst of humanity. No side effects. No horse pills. No cures.

Bad Medicine is:

  • Andy Weld
  • Elizabeth Kemp
  • Michael Alvino
  • Jessica Randazzo
  • Seth Alcorn
  • Kelly Andersen
  • Sean Robinson

Their Guests: Coming soon! Watch this space!

80 T Street Northwest, Washington, DC 20001

Rhode Island Ave & T St, NW

7-ish Blocks from Shaw Metro Station 100 Feet from Capital Bike Share

ContacTUST